Goodbye Shy

I have always been afraid to do things alone, but ironically I spend most of my time alone. This is not by choice it's just that for a while I haven't really had any friends to do things with. As I said before I lost all my friends in high school and ever since that it's been a struggle to connect and make those friendships again. The fact that I spend a lot of time alone prevents me from doing things I want to do. I'm afraid that people will think I'm a loser that doesn't have any friends (which sometimes that's how I feel) or that I'm pathetic. Because I didn't really have any friends in high school I missed out on a lot of things; prom, football games, parties, the list goes on and on. As a result of that I have a lot of regrets about the time I spent in high school. I no longer want to live a life full of regrets, this is the time that I should be regretting the aftermath of the stupid things I did rather than regretting not doing them at a...

I think my shy demeanor comes from the fact that I bottle up all of my emotions. I don't like to talk about things that make me uncomfortable, therefore, I don't and I just keep it all in. Until one day they all come out. I am taking baby steps to overcome my fear of putting myself out there, because it is very difficult for me to do that. My first attempt at this was in class the other day. Our professor was talking about our blogs and was focusing on mine. It wasn't by choice, but I was forced to talk about my blog and open up to the class about it. I was put in a state of vulnerability and it was terrifying, but in a strange way it was kind of relieving.  At home, I'm a very talkative person. I have so much to say, yet I don't in a social setting. Being forced to talk about my life in class is helping me open up to people and be myself.  This wasn't a big advancement in the progress of this blog, but it was something. Like I said before I want...